I don't mean plants that are threatened, or endangered.
I DO mean threatening your plants.
I have a variegated leaf Hydrangea. This plant has been in my yard for 4 years. It is in the perfect spot. A focal point actually, because when I bought it, it was beautiful. Loverly blue flowers. Loverly variegated leaves. Loverly in every way.
Since then, plant has been very uncooperative as far as blooming goes. Meaning it doesn't. It won't. It hasn't. It refuses to.
Until this year.
This year I threatened it.
I have a nice size yard, with various gardens within it. I have room for plenty of plants, and I have plenty of plants. I take care of my plants (reasonably so, anyway). I like plants that are reasonably easy to take care of. I like plants that give me reasonable results in return. Hey, I'm a reasonable woman.
So I reasoned with this Hydrangea, 2 years ago after a second year with no flowers. "Hydrangea, please give me some flowers next year. I take care of you, I'd like to see something in return."
The next year I was nice again. "Hydrangea Dear. I really would like to see some flowers next year. You are in a very visible place in the garden. Your fellow Hydrangeas are all performing wonderfully, I need you to pull yourself up by your bootstraps (rootstraps?) and get busy with some blooms. The variegated leaves are nice, but I need flowers."
This year, no more Mrs. Nice-person. The gardening gloves came off. No flowers, no room in the garden (well, not a focal point anyway).
"Hydrangea..WTF? No flowers again?! I give and I give! I give some more! The watering. The fertilizer. The focal point. The nicey-nicey waiting for flowers. This is what I get in return? NOTHING!? I want flowers this year. NO flowers...and you are OUTTAH HERE! Got it? Get it? Good!"
The Variegated Hydrangea has grudgingly given me 2 flowers. They are at the bottom, you could almost miss them if you weren't looking. I of course was looking. Is this all she could muster do to prove herself worthy of being in the garden? Or the least she and could do and still get away with being in the focal point of the garden? Hmmmmmmm...
I have never watched the Sopranos (I know, I know, what rock do I live under?), but maybe next year I will watch reruns, or invest in a DVD and learn how to properly threaten for results. Next year there will be results or this plant gets whacked.
(or moved to the back garden...sheesh, I'm such a wuss)